A Marriage Unlike Others
25 Jan 2023 15:41:42
I had the fortune to attend a marriage that looked very similar to any other Hindu marriages. Beautiful decoration, warm welcome and stay for guests of both sides. Yes, it was a ‘destination wedding’. One could feel an emotional connect with doting mother, masis, mamas, brothers, sisters, cousins in their twenties to 4-year-olds, nanis and the family head. There were beautiful dance and music programs. Grand ceremonies, all the traditions followed to the T including gifts and shagun etc.
It sounds so normal, like any other typical Hindu wedding, especially in the northern parts of Bharat. What made it different that I felt like writing about it? The difference is that the bridegroom or Dulhan, an engineer, could have ended up in an orphanage if she were lucky; or lived a life in garbage dumps or some squalid corner of a city.
Fortunately, she had been rescued at a very tender age of a few weeks by a loving family of ‘Yashoda maas’, that is, foster mothers under the benign watch of a Hindu sadhvi. This was the 13th wedding in this extended family of about 15 Yashodas and their mother figure. Of these 13 weddings 12 were of daughters and one of a son. All the children are highly educated and married into well-to-do and very good families. The patriarch believes that no child should feel that she/he didn’t get the best in life because she/he was an orphan; hence such an elaborate wedding.
Infact, many children do not even know that their mother is not their biological mother till late in life. Their bonding as brothers and sisters is worth experiencing. The idea was seeded in 1993 when a child was found by the Guru of the Sadhvi in a garbage dump wrapped in some dirty linen and enquired who will take care of her. The Sadhvi came forward that she would. Guru, Swami Parmananda was surprised and asked her, who could she as sadhus keep travelling and have no home. This is when Sadhvi thought of this model.
The model is based on the ancient Hindu model of Yashoda, who was the foster mother of Krishna, whose biological mother was Devki. The Yashodas, in this case, can be some lady who has decided to leave aside normal worldly life and joined the mother of the organization to serve society or someone who has been left on her own by the family or someone who wishes to escape the cruelty of the society. She becomes mother to an orphan found or received by the organization. Each Yashoda maa is given a proper home with all the facilities of a normal domestic life. A Yashoda maa’s family may have 12 children, another one may have 8. The oldest mother has had 42 children. The family may have a mausi or a nani too. All expenses are taken care of like in any other family by the head of the.
Earlier the children used to be sent to different schools as the facilities in Delhi were spread out. Now, in a single campus, there is a high-quality school for these children that is open to others too. There is an excellent school for ‘divyang’ or differently abled children where children both from inside the campus and outside also study and learn life skills from dedicated teachers.
There are many things that I could write about as the campus is a self-contained village by itself. It is a different world of love, compassion, and positivity. But, I wish to focus on this unique model of wonderful secure life that the children enjoy with bright futures they are confident about. It was a treat to watch children flocking to their mothers and mausis and getting photographed, singing bhajans, and poems and some children reciting Geeta during the wedding ceremonies.
This 50-acre campus is named ‘Vatsalya Gram’ – a village of motherly affection on Mathura-Vrindavan road. The affectionate mother is Sadhvi Ritambhara ji, now affectionately called ‘Didi Maa’ by her large family, followers, and supporters across the world. Yes, the same Sadhvi who is known more for her fiery speeches during the Ram Mandir movement given over 2-3 years, and lesser known for her path-breaking humanitarian work of nearly three decades for children and women after she gave up all the name and fame and refused to be drawn into politics. According to one of her close associates, this was her passion even while she was crisscrossing the nation to awaken Indians about the need for Ram Mandir.
For me, it was a revelation when I visited the Vatsalya Gram a few months back and I met Yashoda maas. I was there for three days visiting different projects within the campus and talking to the inmates. Some had come there to do something for the society under Didi Maa, whom they had heard on TV or during her Bhagwat Geeta sermons. Her sermons are attended by lakhs of people. Some women who wished to escape the cruelty of the world and reached Vrindavan to her Vatsalya gram also became mothers. I met a Yashoda who had a number of miscarriages in her married life. To escape the negative attitude of her husband and the family she left home and finally reached her Didi Maa. Now she is a proud mother of eight children!
All the mothers and their children gush with love and respect when they speak about her. She spares no effort or expense to see to it that her large family has the best in the world, the children can pursue what they wish to and not feel deprived in any way. It is a wondrous experience to witness her benign motherly compassion for the children and society.
There are many projects of Sadhvi Ritambhara ji aka Didi Maa about which I will write some day. They show her deep love for the society, the nation and every living being. The motto of Vatsalya Gram is to nurture youth dedicated to the nation. She knows that vulnerable children and women need most support, and that remains her prime focus in life. The marriage that I witnessed was an example of how compassionate care of children and women can radiate positivity in the lives of thousands of people. While she is working hard to replicate this model, I hope others working in this field move beyond the NGO mindset and become mother-like organizations for the children.
It sounds so normal, like any other typical Hindu wedding, especially in the northern parts of Bharat. What made it different that I felt like writing about it? The difference is that the bridegroom or Dulhan, an engineer, could have ended up in an orphanage if she were lucky; or lived a life in garbage dumps or some squalid corner of a city.
Fortunately, she had been rescued at a very tender age of a few weeks by a loving family of ‘Yashoda maas’, that is, foster mothers under the benign watch of a Hindu sadhvi. This was the 13th wedding in this extended family of about 15 Yashodas and their mother figure. Of these 13 weddings 12 were of daughters and one of a son. All the children are highly educated and married into well-to-do and very good families. The patriarch believes that no child should feel that she/he didn’t get the best in life because she/he was an orphan; hence such an elaborate wedding.
Infact, many children do not even know that their mother is not their biological mother till late in life. Their bonding as brothers and sisters is worth experiencing. The idea was seeded in 1993 when a child was found by the Guru of the Sadhvi in a garbage dump wrapped in some dirty linen and enquired who will take care of her. The Sadhvi came forward that she would. Guru, Swami Parmananda was surprised and asked her, who could she as sadhus keep travelling and have no home. This is when Sadhvi thought of this model.
The model is based on the ancient Hindu model of Yashoda, who was the foster mother of Krishna, whose biological mother was Devki. The Yashodas, in this case, can be some lady who has decided to leave aside normal worldly life and joined the mother of the organization to serve society or someone who has been left on her own by the family or someone who wishes to escape the cruelty of the society. She becomes mother to an orphan found or received by the organization. Each Yashoda maa is given a proper home with all the facilities of a normal domestic life. A Yashoda maa’s family may have 12 children, another one may have 8. The oldest mother has had 42 children. The family may have a mausi or a nani too. All expenses are taken care of like in any other family by the head of the.
Earlier the children used to be sent to different schools as the facilities in Delhi were spread out. Now, in a single campus, there is a high-quality school for these children that is open to others too. There is an excellent school for ‘divyang’ or differently abled children where children both from inside the campus and outside also study and learn life skills from dedicated teachers.
There are many things that I could write about as the campus is a self-contained village by itself. It is a different world of love, compassion, and positivity. But, I wish to focus on this unique model of wonderful secure life that the children enjoy with bright futures they are confident about. It was a treat to watch children flocking to their mothers and mausis and getting photographed, singing bhajans, and poems and some children reciting Geeta during the wedding ceremonies.
This 50-acre campus is named ‘Vatsalya Gram’ – a village of motherly affection on Mathura-Vrindavan road. The affectionate mother is Sadhvi Ritambhara ji, now affectionately called ‘Didi Maa’ by her large family, followers, and supporters across the world. Yes, the same Sadhvi who is known more for her fiery speeches during the Ram Mandir movement given over 2-3 years, and lesser known for her path-breaking humanitarian work of nearly three decades for children and women after she gave up all the name and fame and refused to be drawn into politics. According to one of her close associates, this was her passion even while she was crisscrossing the nation to awaken Indians about the need for Ram Mandir.
For me, it was a revelation when I visited the Vatsalya Gram a few months back and I met Yashoda maas. I was there for three days visiting different projects within the campus and talking to the inmates. Some had come there to do something for the society under Didi Maa, whom they had heard on TV or during her Bhagwat Geeta sermons. Her sermons are attended by lakhs of people. Some women who wished to escape the cruelty of the world and reached Vrindavan to her Vatsalya gram also became mothers. I met a Yashoda who had a number of miscarriages in her married life. To escape the negative attitude of her husband and the family she left home and finally reached her Didi Maa. Now she is a proud mother of eight children!
All the mothers and their children gush with love and respect when they speak about her. She spares no effort or expense to see to it that her large family has the best in the world, the children can pursue what they wish to and not feel deprived in any way. It is a wondrous experience to witness her benign motherly compassion for the children and society.
There are many projects of Sadhvi Ritambhara ji aka Didi Maa about which I will write some day. They show her deep love for the society, the nation and every living being. The motto of Vatsalya Gram is to nurture youth dedicated to the nation. She knows that vulnerable children and women need most support, and that remains her prime focus in life. The marriage that I witnessed was an example of how compassionate care of children and women can radiate positivity in the lives of thousands of people. While she is working hard to replicate this model, I hope others working in this field move beyond the NGO mindset and become mother-like organizations for the children.