At the age of 8, Baya lost her husband just three months after her marriage. She was with her parents when she heard about his demise. There were two widows at home, her paternal grandmother and Baya. There were many restrictions on the child widow then, she was not allowed to touch water, her younger sister Krishna, nor was she allowed to go to her mother. She just had to sit quietly, the poor child probably couldn't understand the change. She obviously was not allowed to wear a Kumkum like married women on the forehead. Mother and grandmother would cry when she would ask for the Kumkum.

Her father wanted to complete his pilgrimage to Kashi, but he was feeling guilty as he left it to marry Baya. Mother was pregnant, and delivered the girl child in the seventh month. She had to look after all the household work along with farming. On the fifth day of her mother's delivery, Baya's father returned from Kashi. Baya was hardly 9 years old, but she would help her grandmother. Her old grandmother tried to be strong, but couldn't hold for a long time and died.

After a couple of years, Baya's in-laws wrote a letter to her father and urged him to send Baya to Makhjan, she was 11 years old then. She felt her going to Makhjan would mean there would be one mouth less to feed. Natus was comparatively better off.

Her mother-in-law was a kind lady, she treated Baya well. Of course, Baya too shouldered a lot of responsibilities.

Life at Makhjan

Baya noted that her mother-in-law delivered 20 children out of which only 5 survived, they all treated Baya as their own sibling. This phase of her life was somewhat smooth, though it was a strenuous routine. The young girl would many times miss her mother, but would try to hide and suppress her feelings. She observed that all liked her because she worked continuously and took over many responsibilities. This became a lesson for her throughout her life. Once in a year, she would visit her parents.

Surprisingly her mother-in-law had no affinity for education, but she taught her life values. Of course, she was not allowed to work at home, she shared the responsibilities outside the home. Next ten years Baya lived with her in-laws.

She was not compelled to shave her head till then, but the pressure was so much that her mother-in-law couldn't support her anymore. Ultimately Baya had to relent to the pressure. It was a very painful incident and was to be repeated every month. She cried the whole day, but that would not change her fate. She thought that even death was better compared to this. Now she was confined to home. Baya's brother wanted her to be literate at least, but their mother was not ready to send her to Mumbai. Her sister-in-law died leaving her 4-year-old son behind,so ultimately Baya had to join her brother in Mumbai.

The Mumbai phase

Her brother and Maharshi Karve used to stay together, Maharshi Karve's first wife could not look after the child and other routine chores single-handedly. So her brother sought Baya's help. Fortunately, Baya's in-laws did not create any problems.

Sharada Sadan Phase, a game changer

Now started a new phase of life in Mumbai. She started learning the Marathi alphabet and math tables. Around the same time, Pandita Ramabai advertised her new school for girls. The upper age limit was 20 years, but Baya was 24 by then, fortunately, Ramabai permitted her to enroll. This really was the beginning of a new and life-changing chapter for Baya.

Baya would take the child along with her, and would wear footwear too, people would find this amusing as women never wore footwear. The work at home and attending the school was a bit strenuous. Ramabai invited her to stay at Sharada Sadan, but it was not an easy decision. Her parents too were hesitant, ultimately Ramabai offered to pay RS 50 for a year to get some help, and Baya went to Sharada Sadan.

Baya would help Ramabai to look after her daughter Manorama. Ramabai convinced her to grow hair again, Baya would always cover her hair with her saree and use a safety pin thus no one could notice.

This was a small step towards a great change that was to occur in her life, but she was oblivious to it then. Though she never liked shaving her head, growing hair needed great inner strength. It was against the social sanction, one can witness this kind of struggle throughout her life.